Finding a Set Weight for Your Body...

I know that finding my set weight has been one of the things I have struggled with relentlessly throughout my eating disorder. Finding a set weight requires a trust in your body, and I've never really been good about trust at all, let alone in my own body. My body has always seemed so foreign to me, so my sanity seemed too precious to entrust it with. In my mind, and in the mind of every other anorexic or bulimic, there's always a weight that they want to see themselves, whether they're body naturally goes there or not is a different story. I tried to put health in the forefront of my mind, and stop caring as much about how I looked, but it didn't help, and I am guessing that kind of thinking does not benefit many of my fellow recovering eating disorder readers either. It is easy for doctors and nutritionists to say trust your body, it will eventually reach its set point if you eat healthy. My question was always, what if I don't like that number, or how I look at that number?! No one ever really addressed these questions, perhaps because I didn't bring them up, I wasn't willing to help myself at the time, and I was scared. The truth is that when you first start gaining weight, and at least get to a relatively healthy weight, you will have to learn to like the way you look, or at least accept it, differently than you accepted an emaciated appearance. I believe you may never LOVE the way you look, or maybe you will, but acceptance is a good and healthy start in recovery. I don't always like the way I look, and many times I wish I could be much thinner, but I have to realize that it is unhealthy thinking, and that I've been there before. Within the healthy weight range, I think you can work with your body and your mind together to find a happy medium between the two. I don't think you should have to look in the mirror and hate how you look because your body likes to be heavier than you think looks good. This being said, healthy measures must still be taken in order to keep your metabolism up, and your mind from returning to its old evils. I would suggest either the Candida diet I've listed above, or for a less intense alternative, perhaps a low carb diet. Just decreasing your carbs can help boost metabolism and burn fat, and it's a much healthier form of eating than most Americans eat anyways. Combining this with a moderate amount of exercise, I think that even if a person's set weight is slightly above what they wish, then these simple lifestyle changes will help produce weight loss and make you feel better about yourself without taking extreme measures. I've learned that the more restricting that takes place, the more damage to your metabolism goes on, this only causes more weight gain. This is obviously the opposite desired effect, and cannot continue forever. My experience with the eating disorder roller coaster has taught me that balance of eating right, exercising and keeping my calories above 1200 is the only way for me to find my true and healthy set point.