Fairwell to Topamax

I have officially quit Topamax, FINALLY! I feel like this has been dragging on for far too long, and it finally needed to end. My experience with it was rather odd, and has been very uncomfortable at times. I started at 100mg, tapered down to 75mg and then to 50mg and had no problems with weight gain. It was not until I decided to taper down to 25mg that I started to have some weight gain. This was obviously very scary, because it didn't matter what I ate, or if I worked out, I was gaining. I increased my dose back up to 50mg without relief, I still continued to gain more weight. I even tried 75mg to try and halt the weight loss, thinking I was going at this in the wrong way. 75mg did nothing as well, so I decided that since I was gaining weight on the Topamax, I might as well just go off of it and hope for the best. I was horrible to realize that this drug had screwed up my body so much that I had absolutely no control over my weight gain. I could do everything right and still gain weight, this frustrated me beyond belief. I may still be in the midst of the weight gain, because I might still gain more, I don't know. This is hard for me to relinquish my hold and control on my body, but I've had to do it in order to get off the medicine. So far I have gained 6 lbs. This may not seem like a lot, but it felt terrible to put 6 lbs on while doing everything right. It has been extremely hard not to go back to my old habits of starving myself and exercising all night. I realize that that will not help me, I just need to wait out the storm and do all I can. This being said, I had decided to start a workout routine to build muscle and get into shape. I am hoping that doing so will help me drop the 6 lbs I gained and get toned so I can combat the weight gain and effects from the drug. I will update you further on the specifics of my exercise routine later. I just want to encourage anyone that's having trouble with managing weight gain and an eating disorder to reach out to someone. It really helped me to have my fiance around while all of this was going on!